Summer Life So Far

Well, summer isn't as much of a reprieve as I had hoped it would be.  I was supposed to have my job from last year, and the company assured me that I would up until the week after college let out.  That's when I learned that another person was vying for the job.  As lady luck would have it, he got the job and I was left to find summer employment in the worst job market in 20 or more years.  ARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!

Don't get me wrong, I'm not angry that the other person got the job.  Management has to make the decision that's in their best interest, but if I had known about this two months ago, I could have applied for internships and would have gotten an offer from at least one.  Instead, I'm left to look through the meager help wanted adds and resort to waiting tables.  UGH, I loathe the very thought of waiting tables. 

I'm just not fast enough for that kind of work.  Give me a project and I can get it done, but ask me to carry five meals on a tray and deliver it in under a minute in a restaurant full of people is like asking a bull to not break anything in a china shop.  They're are bound to be accidents.  :(''''

Anyway, life at home is kinda stressful too.  Dad is getting strung out with the prospect of me actually growing up.  Plus, I haven't been living at home for the past 9 months, so neither of us know how to proceed from here.  He still sees me as a teenager that knows nothing about the world, but I know how to solve some of life's problems already.  Don't get me wrong, I know I'm not fully ready to go out on my own yet.  I don't have a job or all of the necessary life skills to succeed just yet, but I don't have to be constantly monitored either.  I guess it's kinda touch and feel for now.  Oh well..............hopefully this summer will improve.

Oh Well......

This semester is coming to a close and I can truthfully say good-ridance.  This semester has been aweful for quite sometime now.  If it wasn't a bad test, or a pressing assignment, someone at CGSA didn't do what they were supposed to do which made me feel like I should do it.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not blaming anyone for not doing their job, but I can kinda understand why things didn't get done sometimes.  

I think I took on too much this semester, and my grades and sanity have suffered for it.  I was looking at my classes earlier, trying to predict my GPA for this semester.  I thought that it would be around a 3.6 to a 3.8, but it looks like it will be more like a 3.4. XP  Then I started to figure out why it was going to be so low, and I determined that they were minor reasons.  I understood the material, did well on the major assignments, and will probably do well on the finals.  In my organic class, I failed to realize that his questions were coming straight out of a practise packet that he gave us at the beginning of the school year until before the last test.  I made 70s on the first two tests but pulled a 90 on the third test.  Then in history, I lost track of some of the minor assigments which will cause my grade in that class to be a B instead of an A. 

I guess I'll just chalk this semester up to being a learning experience.  I shouldn't try to take on as much as I did this semester ever again.  I envy those that can run off of 4 hours of sleep and do what seems to be impossible in one day.  Those people that take 20+ hours and can still have a high GPA just mystify me.  I'm definitely not one of them.  Oh well, I'll just save these lessons until next year.

Oh Happy Day

And I thought that today was going to be a bad day.  I was wrong.  YAY!! :)

I got my test back in thermo today and found that I scored an 80.  I didn't know what I was doing half the time on that test, but i must have known part of what I was doing.  The class average was a 60, ouch. After that, I had to get ready for my next test in Organic 2.

I went to my BS history class and studied there.  Then I went to take the test which wasn't that bad actually.  I'm guessing that I made somewhere around a 95.  Today hasn't been that bad, and the only thing left to do now is meet up with my group in thermo and work on our project.  It seems like some of the other group members have already made some headway, so it shouldn't be that bad. 

Life is good. 

FML

Argggggggggggg!!!!  That's all that I can say. My test in thermo just ended, and it was horrible.  I think I might have gotten a 65 on it.  :(

It's not like I didn't study either.  I started studying a week ago, and I made sure to cove the Rankine cycle, just like Dr. Kitchens said.  I understood the material too, but this test was killer.  It was confusing and the answers didn't make sense.   HEAT CANNOT FLOW FROM A HOT TO A COLD AREA.   I worked that problem out three times and got the same answer.  I think Dr. Kitchens made an error on that problem.  He did on the last test, so it wouldn't surprise me.  And I thought that my life was going well since I got a test with a 98 back yesterday.   Oh well, chalk it up, but the board is turning rather white.

:(....

Serenity

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....................................
That's all I can say. Everything seems so much better now that I met Mikey. We're an official couple now. YAY!!!! It's funny how everything takes on a new look when you have some one to share it with. I can't stop thinking about him, and I love it when he holds me. I feel safe there, but most of all, I feel at peace. Oh, my parents came this past weekend.

They stayed at the campground in Anderson, and I introduced them to Mikey which went very well. They like him and he likes them. :) I just have to introduce him to my sister and brother-in-law. If all goes well, I'll be able to do that over Spring Break. Well, this was only a short post, but I'll just end it here.

A New Beginning

Well, I haven't been writing for a while because life hasn't offered anything of interest. Life has only offered the same old routine of classes, endless assignments, and countless study sessions with classmates. I guess my new co-social chair position with CGSA offered a change of pace in the beginning, but even that has fallen into a sort of routine. This was my life up until February the 10th.
For a long time, I was searching for that special someone. I ran into a bit of a snag with an overly emo and immature kid named Pierceton, and I was kind of disgusted with my love life in general for a while. I would ask, sometimes scream, "why is it so hard to find someone that genuinely cares about you?" It was a very frustrating experience, and I was almost ready to give up hope and resort to random sexual encounters for the rest of my life as a substitute. Well, that's a bit of an exaggeration, but you get the idea. Thankfully, I met him.
It was a chance encounter on an online not really dating dating site which shall remain nameless. I read his profile and thought that he would be an interesting guy to talk to, so I messaged him in hopes of receiving a reply. A week went by with no response, and I tried to cultivate an online friendship with other users of the site. To my dismay, most of these people were creeps who only wanted sex. I must confess that I did receive a small amount of enjoyment out of toying with these types of people. I guess I'm a tease at heart. Finally, he messaged me back and we started to chat online.
His name was Mikey, and he immediately caught my full attention. I was talking to two or three other people at the time, but I immediately gravitated to him. To put it simply, we just connected, and I could sense that he was a genuine person. We talked well into the night. We both went through a fully charged laptop battery and still didn't want to part, but we decided that we should meet in real life sometime. I went to bed with a happy feeling that night. I didn't realize that we would meet sooner than I anticipated.
February 10th was a few days later. It was a Tuesday, and as always, I left my dorm room at about 11:55 PM because my roomate needed to go to bed. I went to my usual study spot in Bracket only to find that someone had already taken it. i grumbled to myself and went to the library as a second choice. I set down with my computer and began to study for my test in Environmental history the following day. After a short while, I decided that I needed a break, so I opened my laptop and found that Mikey was available to chat. Not wanting to pass up an opportunity to talk to someone that seemed so amazing, I asked how he was doing. He responded by saying that he was well and that he had come to the library for a distraction from his daily life. I was surprised to hear this and asked if he would like to meet me, and he replied by saying sure. He also said that he was nervous, and I too was a little nervous which is unusual these days. The first time I saw him, I knew that there was something there.
He was so adorable with that tanned leather coat of his and his blue eyes and his wide mischievous smile. His hair was brown and curly but short, and his form was normal height but slightly muscular. We decided to go for a walk to get to know each other and ease our nerves.
We ended up at Brooks where we stayed for a while. I played on the piano and he told me stories of his band days. He was a trumpet player and then a drum major. We left Brooks around 12:30 AM and then walked around campus until 2:00 AM in the morning. He walked with me back to my dorm and I reluctantly went to bed. The next time we met was that Friday.
He went to a bar with his friends and I stayed at the dorm, since you had to be 21 to get in. It was only an hour though before he called me and asked if he could come over and hang out. I said that I would like that a lot, so he came over and I introduced him to everyone. Melissa loved talking to him almost as much as I do. Melissa, Mikey, and I stayed up until 6:00 AM that morning just talking and walking around Clemson. The next day was Valentine's day.
I woke up around 3:00 PM, got dressed, and headed to his house. He took me to a national forest and showed me this amazing waterfall and mountain tunnel. Then he took me to his favorite swimming spots where we sat until 6:00 that night and just talked to one another. We then went back to his house and curled up on the couch where we watched the first season of Queer as Folk and talked for a while. Then it happened. He placed his head on my shoulder, and we both knew then that there was attraction. He then kissed me which was amazing, and I knew that something had changed. I felt like a new person, like my life was at a new beginning. I'm happy.

Same Old Same Old

Well, Christmas break ended a while ago, and I'm not back at college, sitting in my dorm room, writing this post. It's the same pattern, same routine, same everything. You get up, go to class, eat, go to the rest of your classes, do homework, and sleep. You wake up the next morning and repeat. It's really kinda dull if you think about it. You would think that being in college would provide a wealth of activities for you to do on the weekend, but alas, a little college town holds no such luck. I guess I need to seek out some entertainment by breaking out of my shell here, but that takes time, at least it does for me.
I've made some headway though, talking to new people. I'm going to hang out with someone that I've been talking to on facebook for a while tomorrow. YAY!!! I'm excited to finally get out of this dorm room and do something. I do need to meet more people though, which brings me to a dilemma. You see, my personality type is introverted to begin with, but at the same time, I like to talk to new people. The hardest part for me is the first contact with the person because I really have no idea of what to say. Basically, I ask them what their name is after I say hello and ask them their major. Then I hope that they reply because I'll have to scramble to find a topic of conversation if they don't. I'm working on it though, guess that's all I can do.
On a less serious note, this semester seems to be much better than last semester. Taking 15 hours is much more manageable than taking 17, and my schedule this semester is better as well. This means that I actually have the time to find new people now. I guess I should end this short note with this optimistic outlook. Till next time.

Reflections

Wow, a lot has happened in the past few weeks, and I need to gather my thoughts a little. I became an uncle over this Christmas break. My niece, Allie, was born on December 23. She weighed 7 pounds 11 ounces and was given a clean bill of health. People ask how does it feel to be an uncle, and you really don't have a good answer to give them. I don't feel any more special because I'm now an uncle, but I do feel a deep connection with the baby. She's cute, she's funny to watch, and she's got both my sister's and brother-in-law's looks. I guess the most exciting part of the experience is not knowing what Allie will become while knowing that I get to watch Allie discover that for herself. I can honestly say one thing though, holding her for the first time made me feel a little old. I felt a deep sense of joy, but I still felt a little old. After all, I'll be 38 when she graduates high school. :( I go back to college tomorrow, and I'm going to miss my favorite niece.

I'm going to miss my whole family. My dad is creating a video for my great aunt an uncle's 60th wedding anniversary at the request of their daughter. (that was a little convoluted) It's just a slide show set to music, but it's amazing to look at photos taken over a 60 year period, especially when they record the lives of two people and their family. That's beside the point however. My dad and I have been looking for songs to go with this video, and one of the songs that we listened to was called Grandpa by The Judds.

Grandpa lyrics

Grandpa
Tell me 'bout the good old days.
Sometimes it feels like
This world's gone crazy.
Grandpa, take me back to yesterday,
Where the line between right and wrong
Didn't seem so hazy.

Did lovers really fall in love to stay
Stand beside each other come what may
was a promise really something people kept,
Not just something they would say
Did families really bow their heads to pray
daddies really never go away
Whoa oh Grandpa,
Tell me 'bout the good old days.

musical interlude

Grandpa
Everything is changing fast.
We call it progress,
But I just don't know.
And Grandpa, let's wonder back into the past,
And paint me a picture of long ago.

Did lovers really fall in love to stay
Stand beside each other come what may
Was a promise really something people kept,
Not just something they would say and then forget
Did families really bow their heads to pray
daddies really never go away
Whoa oh Grandpa,
Tell me 'bout the good ole days.

Whoa oh Grandpa,
Tell me 'bout the good ole days.

Musical interlude
Humming

	The Judds - Grandpa
	Found at bee mp3 search engine

Yes it's country, and I normally detest the mention of a country song. I make an exception with this one because it's lyrics just really made me realize how much I care for my family. It's sung from the perspective of a small child asking her grandpa to tell her about the good ole days, which were characterized by family closeness while commenting on the collapse of the family in modern times. It makes me realize just how special my family is because we're very close while most people aren't close to their family. I'm thankful that I have my family. I don't know what I would do without them.

While I was packing today, I ran across some of my possessions that I haven't seen for a long time. It made me think about all of the good times that my family and I had together. With Allie, I look forward to having many more.